Pop's newest bad girl nearly attended a prestigious college and says she wants to sound like Arcade FireClick here to see the mind numbing video!
What was your life like right before you became a pop star?
I was going to go to Barnard, so I came up to New York and studied comparative religion and psychology and stuff for three months, but that all went out the window. I loved math and I was way into studying the Cold War, so after high school, I would sneak in the college classes and listen, but then one day [hitmakers] Max Martin and Dr. Luke called me, and they were like, "Hey, be a pop star." "Yeah, OK, let's do this."
You had a demo floating around?
Yeah, it was like trip-hop, it was so bad. At the end of one track I was just jacking off, making an ass of myself, and they were like, "Oh my God, she's borderline retarded," so they thought it was funny.
Why did you go to L.A.?
Luke and Max were there. At the same time, I don't know who my birth father is, so this guy called me and was like, "Hey, I think I'm your birth father, I'll buy you a plane ticket." So I get off the plane and meet this guy. Have you ever seen The 40-Year-Old Virgin? You know that video game chair? He had one, and he played it all the time. I was like, "There's no way that half of my DNA is made up of someone who has a video game chair."
But you stayed out west.
Well, I fell in love with this dude, he saved me from the father who is not my father, and I stayed for a few years. I just recently moved back to Nashville, finally. I think John Lennon said his stay in L.A. was the "lost weekend," and I absolutely agree with that.
Were you in Hollywood?
All over the place. There were times I'd live in my car and just crash with friends, because I was really broke for periods of time, then I'd live with the ex-boyfriend, then an apartment in Echo Park, then I was living in Laurel Canyon in this house with anywhere from seven to 10 roommates at any given point — musicians and artists, but mostly just douchebags.
You're anti-douchebag, but you lived in L.A. for four years.
I got the fuck out of there — you know what it is? I went there to accomplish something and live a part of my life out. I made it through, I made a record about it, but I'm so done. It's so gross. Then there was a morning when I woke up and said, "All right, I need to get out of here, the soul-sucking has begun."
... and that's just the first page. If she could only comprehend how amazing her last sentence was.
It's a crazy thought, but does this now make Britney wholesome again? I mean this Ke$ha is taking it to a whole new level whether she knows it or not, and let me just say that I definitively think she doesn't know it. THE SOUL-SUCKING HAS BEGUN.
Click here if you really feel the need to blow the rest of you brains out.