Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Welcome to Earf...

So I actually saw Orphan last night (I already heard you hated it Nate) and I have to say, it was everything a stupid horror flick should be. I mean we're not talking Drag Me To Hell here but it is a film that really does serve it's purpose. In a nutshell I enjoyed it, and to be honest I don't feel one ounce of pathetically self imposed pseudo-intellectually superior guilt for saying so. Some films are just made in the name of idiocy for idiocy, and I have to admit that every now and then I find it quite healthy to indulge in such idiocy. There's got to be a medical journal somewhere that makes a claim for scary movies. Whats so wrong with going to a movie with a chick, getting a little tense, hiding it from her, and then smooching when it's all over. It's at least gotta be good for your colon.

With that being said I don't know what kind of stupid darkness lurks in the soul of Roland Emmerich but whatever it is, it no longer entertains or heals on any level. 2012 is sure to be the bad movie of all bad movies, the scum of all scum, the dirt of all dirt, and sadly probably the biggest disaster moneymaker of all disaster moneymaker's. What could possibly be next..?


  1. Dude, au contraire w/r/t to my take on Orphan-- I had a great time watching it, esp. given the demographic makeup and therefore stereotypical movie-theatre behavior of my fellow moviegoers (when Esther came downstairs for school in that Victorian-type dress and her new adopted mother told her it wasn't appropriate, a woman in front of me exclaimed, "too churchy!") Like you said, it was everything a bad horror movie experience should be, and while it didn't seem to belong in the realm of intentional self-parody, it definitely indulged and over-indulged its target audiences with their obvious desires-- desire to get scared, desire to get smooched, desire to see that bitch get her head kicked in at the end, etc., and had no pretentions of attempting anything more serious, which is refreshing.